It’s May, a month the reminds me of my mother, who was born on May 16, and of caregiving, an endeavor that I first did for my late mother, who I tended during her long illness when I was a young woman.
May, which, to me, is also a month of hope, spring flowers, and new growth, has become a special time to celebrate Surprise a Caregiver Day, a holiday that can happen anytime in the month. People simply pick a caregiver and surprise them with a gift on a day of their choosing.
The idea for the holiday stems from an event that happened to me during my second time as a caregiver, which occurred after my late husband, Don, suffered a stroke and was paralyzed from the neck down. A carpenter working on a project in our home noticed my efforts on my husband’s behalf and decided to do something surprising. His wife worked at a spa, and they gifted me with a day of pampering at her workplace.
I was overcome with heartfelt surprise. I felt seen and appreciated for caregiving work that was typically unnoticed by others. With that gift, I became the one being cared for, and their thoughtfulness made such a difference in my journey with Don over the next few years. That day even became part of the inspiration for the Kathi Koll Foundation, which provides gifts to caregivers who need to have their spirits lifted.
So, if you know a caregiver, take a moment to appreciate them this month. Caregivers suffer disproportionately from exhaustion, depression, and other stress-induced health issues, and they need love, encouragement, and attention. For the estimated 63 million caregivers in the United States, Surprise a Caregiver Day can be a way to bring them a feeling of happiness and appreciation that may last for years.
Here are some ideas to inspire you:
1) Tokens of Appreciation
Most people enjoy flowers, candy, or a gift card for a spa, restaurant, or coffee shop. A note, such as “Thinking of you and everything you do each day,” can be so appreciated that a caregiver might put it on the refrigerator as a reminder that someone sees their efforts and cares. Recipients of the Foundation’s gifts tell us that such acknowledgements are often more important that the gifts themselves, so, if you can’t afford a present this year, take a few minutes to jot down your kind thoughts and share them with someone who needs them.
2) The Gift of Time
For many caregivers, the most precious commodity is time. They often have little of it for themselves, so it’s hard to step away to rejuvenate and relax. The best gift for these overworked souls is the gift of your time. So, if you have an hour or more to share, offer to step forward and care for their loved one. Your gift will allow them to go for a walk, visit with a friend, or enjoy another cherished activity, while also helping them feel seen and appreciated.
3) Look Out for Strangers
If you don’t know a caregiver, but you’d still like to help one, share your goal with friends and relatives. Since one out of every four adults in the United States is a caregiver, you’re likely to quickly find someone who would be happily surprised by a token of appreciation. However, if you aren’t able to find a caregiver, reach out to the Foundation. We would be happy to surprise a caregiver on your behalf.
Thank you for reading, be well, and please share with a friend.
All my best,
—KK
We are grateful to have been helping caregivers in need for over 10 years thanks to the support of the many generous and caring friends who have helped make a difference in so many lives.
Please consider donating to the Kathi Koll Foundation so you can help make a difference in struggling family caregivers’ lives. Thank you!