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Keeping Intimacy Alive

Keeping intimacy alive is a challenge in any relationship, but when one partner has had a stroke, the challenges can multiply.

Strangely enough, after my husband had a massive stroke that left him paralyzed from the neck down, our love for each other grew stronger. This may seem odd since our relationship and our lives also were tested in ways I could never have imagined.

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Enjoying the Holidays After a Stroke

After my husband suffered a catastrophic stroke in 2005, the holidays didn’t seem so merry.

I found myself yearning for our life before Don became paralyzed from the neck down and had to use a respirator to breathe. Everything about the holiday season seemed to emphasize how our old life was gone and how our present reality was nothing either of us had wanted.

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A Conversation with My Grandchildren

After a parent or grandparent becomes disabled, how will a child react? We recently did a piece that offered advice from LA-based psychologist Bonnie Berman on how to talk to children about disability.

This was something I worried about after Don became sick—how will my grandchildren react when they see Don on a respirator and moving in a wheelchair for the first time?

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How to Talk to Kids When a Disability Strikes a Loved One

When a parent or grandparent has a stroke or other sudden health incident and has become fully or partially disabled, talking to children about it can be a delicate endeavor. The task can be especially challenging if the beloved adult no longer communicates or moves as s/he once did. How should this conversation be approached and what words should a caring adult use? I sat down with Los Angeles-based psychologist Dr. Bonnie Berman to get insights into the best approach.

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Acceptance is the Answer

In our work with caregivers, one of the issues we see all the time is the challenge that people have in accepting their new lives. Their spouse may now be partially disabled or have a long recovery road ahead of them and their life is 180 degrees different than it was. When they talk about some of the difficulties they’re experiencing, there’s a frequent undertone of longing that their life will return to ‘normal’ at some point.

Holiday Tips for the Caregiver

The holidays can be stressful under ideal circumstances,

The holidays can be a tough time of year, particularly for caregivers. There are more activities and expectations, and you are supposed to be happy because, hey, it’s the holidays! But that’s just not the reality for many people. But, as I have learned, when you’re caring for a loved one, it’s even more important to take time to enjoy the season.

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Being Prepared

Last week, I met a woman whose husband suffered a serious health incident. She was in the process of setting up long-term care options for him and shared how difficult it was to locate all of his legal and medical documents, some of which were now lost.